A Mink Coat for My Bride

As we've communicated, we've had one heck of a time with minks.  Last year they killed 39 hens.  When you think about the cost of the birds, the cost of the feed that we ran through them, and the cost of the eggs that we could have eaten and sold, it is mind-boggling the destruction that this little cunning, devious, blood-thirsty varmint causes.

We have since built the flock back up and protected the henhouse by pouring concrete over the entire floor which bars the mink from digging under and getting inside.  Trouble is, minks can get into any one inch square opening - and they found chinks in our "armor."  This year, the same carnage continued.  The other day I opened the henhouse to find 15 hens strewn about on the floor - dead as the proverbial door nail.

I killed 15 squirrels in the yard, gutted them, saving the guts in a bucket and caught a mink!  I thought our troubles were done, but quickly learned that where there's one, there's at least one more.  The next day, in broad daylight, the mink killed two more.  I declared war.  I reset my trap with fresh bloody squirrel guts with a sardine thrown on top for good measure, and caught another!  Here is this cursed creature:

This is a devious hellion, by any definition.  Press the arrow below on the short video and listen to his angry shriek as I walk up on him.  It's a blood-curdling noise, for sure.  No doubt about it.  He knows that he has a cruel payday coming for the violence he's meted out.

The Bible has quite a lot to say about men (and creatures) like this.

Proverbs 1:11: "If they say, Come with us, let us lay wait for blood, let us lurk privily for the innocent without cause:"

 
Proverbs 6:16-19 "These six things doth the Lord hate: yea, seven are an abomination unto him: A proud look, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood, An heart that deviseth wicked imaginations, feet that be swift in running to mischief, false witness that speaketh lies, and he that soweth discord among brethren.

I instituted Old Testament eye for an eye judgment on him.

Look at those teeth that were used to end the lives of those innocent hens that laid delicious eggs for us.  Oh, the treachery!

But I wasn't done yet.  I had buried the previous mink I trapped in the garden.  At least he'd grow some good vegetables for me.  But this one, I said to myself, "I'm going to skin him and make a mink coat for my wife."  And so, I sharpened my knife, hung the mink from the barn rafters and skinned him out.  I felt like Jeremiah Johnson in the wilderness.  (I messed up the tail.  I'm still a novice furrier.)

With a sharp knife and a little effort, the job was done.  I wish I could say I felt sympathy for the beast, but I felt none.

The pelt of the mink was soft and luxurious.  I was proud of my first foray into the fur trade.

I learned about saving the glands of the mink as an attractant.  You can see them in the gruesome photo below.  I saved the carcass and guts of the mink and have rebaited the trap, using the ill-fated mink as bait to catch more of his brethren.  So far, it's been two nights and no more minks in the trap.  On the bright side, there have been no additional chicken fatalities to report.

With bated breath (pun intended), I presented my wife with her own mink coat.  I could not wait to see her exuberance, her joy, upon my presentation of the luxurious fur.

She was not as excited as I had anticipated.  I know, I know...  It's not really a mink coat.  It's too small.  I'm thinking that I could at least make mink ear muffs for her or something else like mittens.  I'll keep setting the traps to catch more minks.  I want to be vigilant and not let my guard down.  The hens are counting on us.

Matthew 5:5 says, "Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth."  The mink, on the other hand shall NOT inherit the earth - at least not our little corner of it.